Banishing the Doubts
by digitalfletch
Summary: Set in 1991. Anna and Robert work to repair their fraying marriage after Faison hypnotizes Robert into thinking Anna has betrayed him.


Author's Note: Another trip back to the days of vintage GH. Set in 1991, this takes place just a few days after Robert sees Anna making love to Faison in their hotel suite. After several angry confrontations with Anna in which she strenuously denies it, Sean and Anna manage to convince Robert that he was hypnotized by Faison. So he goes to see Tom Hardy for de-programming and the next day embarks on a cross-country trip to visit canneries owned by Faison's cartel. When he leaves Port Charles he and Anna are clearly still estranged, and yet when he returns a few days later he's once again a loving husband. It was as if nothing had ever happened, which always seemed odd to me given Robert's suspicious nature. So I've added a few missing scenes to flesh out the story.

* * *

The chime of the doorbell rang clearly through the silent apartment. Sean Donely looked up from the papers he was reading and glanced at the clock. It read 10:07 pm. He stood up from the couch slowly, wondering who on earth would be calling on he and Tiff at this time of night.

The bell rang again, more insistently.

He tossed the papers onto the table and started across the room.

The bell rang a third time.

"All right, all right," he murmured as he reached for the doorknob.

He opened the door and slim figure with long dark hair stood in the hallway, fidgeting with impatience.

"Anna," he said in surprise, and then quickly stepped aside as she stalked past him into the room without a greeting.

Sean shut the door and turned to face his guest. He gestured towards the couch but she shook her head wordlessly, beginning instead to stride restlessly around his living room.

Not a social call then, Sean deduced. He gazed more closely at his old friend and felt a glimmer of concern spark in his chest.

Anna's hands were clenched into fists and there was a look on her face that he hadn't seen in a long time. Her jaw was set and her dark eyes were hard and steely. He knew that look. She was spoiling to fight something. He hoped it wouldn't be him.

"Anna? What is it, honey?" From the expression in her eyes he suspected he already knew.

"It's Robert," she said, confirming his suspicions.

"What about him?" asked Sean. "Wasn't he with you at General Hospital today? Did something happen?"

"Yes, we were there," Anna said without pausing in her restless movement. "We got back late and had dinner at the hotel. It was awful, Sean," she burst out. "It was like we were strangers!"

"I'm sure that's not –"

"It was all we could do to make small talk, as if we hadn't just been on our honeymoon." She shook her head. "It was like we were back in 1985, when I first came to Port Charles. I guess Robert still can't forget about the past."

He watched her warily as she paced the room like a caged tiger, seemingly oblivious to the hole she was wearing in his carpet.

"I just can't bear it, Sean, that he's still so suspicious of me!"

Sean had a clear handle on the problem now. He closed the distance to her, needing her to pay careful attention to what he was about to say. "He's a cop, Anna. One of the very best. A good cop deals in evidence. And what stronger evidence is there than the evidence of your own eyes? In his mind he _saw_ you together with Faison."

"But it's not _true_," she protested, desperation in her eyes.

"Of course it's not," he agreed. "But to Robert it must be."

"Then how do I get through to him, Sean? I didn't do anything!"

"Anna –"

She barreled on, "I thought we'd gotten through all this before the wedding. How can he think I could possibly betray him again? With Faison, of all people? Why can't he just trust me, the way I've always trusted him?"

Sean knew the answer to that one, and he was going to have to tell her even though she wasn't going to like it. "Because he's Robert. He's never given you a reason _not_ to trust him."

For the first time Anna paused in her frenetic pacing. She looked up at Sean as he moved to stand before her.

"Robert's not like you and me, honey," said Sean softly. "Think about it! You may want him to forget the past, but you can't forget that you and I have been on both sides of the fence. We've both lied, we've both cheated, we've both done things we're not proud of. But not Robert."

"I know that," said Anna with a frown and an impatient huff.

"I know you do," Sean replied, "but I don't think you quite see the implications. Don't you see, Robert's been betrayed by everyone he's ever loved – by you, by me, by his own brother, Mac – all the people he's ever trusted. By rights he should run a mile from all of us…and yet, he still spent hours in there today with Tom Hardy, fighting for his marriage. Fighting for you."

Blinking against a sudden blur of tears, Anna nodded.

"It's not your past he's trying to fight, Anna. It's his own. All the old betrayals, not just yours."

Anna swallowed thickly, sensing the truth in his words. "Then how can I –"

"He'll give you another chance."

She licked her lips as doubts assailed her. "I'm not so sure."

"I am," Sean replied confidently. "God knows he's given me enough."

Knowing that was true, Anna's expression softened. "You should have seen him today, Sean. He looked like he'd been in a war." She raked a hand through her hair. "I guess he has been."

Sean nodded.

"Tom said – he said we needed to take it slow. Spend a little time apart while Robert…" Her voice trailed off. "I just don't know how much longer I can stand it."

Sean reached out and gripped her shoulders. "You've just got to be patient, Anna. He'll come out of it, you know he will. He loves you too much."

Anna bit her lip. "I love him, too," she breathed. "So much. It almost frightens me sometimes, Sean," she admitted in a low voice, suddenly pensive.

"_You_, frightened?" he scoffed. "Of what?"

"Of how much I love him. Of what I would do to protect him." Her dark, intent eyes lifted to meet his. "You don't know how much I want to kill Faison for what he's done to us."

"No, you can't!" Sean's hands on her shoulders tightened reflexively. "That's the one thing you can't do. Not even for Robert's sake."

Anna's gaze bored flint-like into Sean's. "I'd die for him, Sean. I'd kill for him, too."

"You think I don't know that?" Sean demanded. "You think Robert doesn't know that? That you'd sacrifice anything and everything for him?" He shook his head. "That's exactly the problem, don't you see?"

Anna stared at him. "What?"

"Robert hates that he's your weakness. That loving him makes you vulnerable."

Anna sucked in a sharp breath.

"He knows that when you're trying to protect him you get reckless, willing to take terrible chances, and it scares the hell out of him." He relaxed his hands, seeing that she was settling down again, beginning to listen to him.

"You think I don't feel the same way?"

He nodded. "Of course you do. But right now he's the one in trouble, and you've got to keep your head. You've just got to sit tight and be patient," he reiterated.

Anna grimaced. "You know patience isn't exactly my strong suit."

"I know, I know." Sean's grip on her shoulders tightened sympathetically. As long as he'd known his former agent and current friend she had always preferred doing to waiting, had always been eager to take the fight to the enemy. Yet he was certain now was not the time for her to do that. "But the best thing you can do for Robert right now is stay away from Faison."

She gave him a tentative nod.

"You have to trust him, Anna. Just like you always have."

* * *

Anna dug in her purse for her hotel room key. It was late, and it had been a long, long day. All those hours spent sitting on the sidelines while Robert fought his battle against the demons that had been loosed in his head had nearly driven her out of her mind. She had to keep reminding herself that none of this was Robert's fault – it was Faison's. If they let him split them up, then he would win. And she would never, ever allow that.

But they were getting through it, they were surviving it, with Tom's help – and now Sean's.

It had been such a relief to talk to him, to someone who had known both she and Robert for so many years now, and who knew them both so well. Someone who gave her some desperately needed perspective.

The reminder that despite their differences in the past Sean had never truly lost Robert's friendship had helped to reassure her, to quiet her innermost fear that she wasn't losing her husband forever, that he really would come around. That he would come to understand she hadn't betrayed him and would die before she'd ever do it again.

Sean said the best thing she could do for her marriage now was to wait, and to trust. Well, she wasn't any good at waiting. But she did trust Robert, fully and completely. She always had. So she would just have to trust him again, trust in his capacity to ultimately see the truth. Trust in _them_.

Because although Sean had been right about many things he'd said tonight, in one crucial way he'd been wrong. She and Robert had always been stronger together. While perhaps it was true that they could be each other's weakness, when they were together they were each other's greatest strength.

The thought warmed her to her core, like a glass of port on a cold winter's night. She almost felt as if she had a chance of actually sleeping tonight.

Then she remembered that, for the first time since their marriage, she would be sleeping alone.

Her fingers finally touched metal, and she fumbled the key into the lock and slipped into the darkened room. It was quiet, almost too quiet, for Robert had gone to bed early in preparation for his trip the next morning. Anna paused for a moment to gather enough courage to turn on the light and make her way towards Robin's room, acutely aware he was just across the hall – physically so near, and yet he might as well be as far away as the moon.

A vase of tall red flowers sat on the table in the middle of the room. For a moment Anna's heart pounded in shock, before she realized that the flowers were roses. They were roses. They were _not_ orchids. They weren't from Faison.

She let out a breath, willing her pulse to return to normal.

A small white envelope protruded from the top of the arrangement. Anna crossed the room and snatched it up. She tore it open and read the brief contents:

_Love you. Always. – R_

Anna closed her eyes as a feeling of warmth washed over her. No matter how bad things were he somehow always knew just what to say to make everything right with her world. Tonight, apparently, was no exception.

She pressed the note to her lips and then to her chest, over her heart. Then she crossed the suite to the bedroom, their bedroom. The room was dark but to her relief the door stood ajar. Another sign that, despite the battle still going on his mind, he wasn't shutting her out completely. Yet despite her best efforts to remain calm her hands shook slightly and she reached out to steady herself against the doorknob.

She kept her voice soft but pitched it to carry clearly into the darkened room. "Robert?"

His reply was groggy but immediate: "Yeah?"

"I love you, too, Robert," Anna promised fervently, gripping the doorknob hard. The distance between them was like a physical ache and it was taking a massive effort of will not to continue the last few steps into the room and into his arms. "Always."

She heard Robert exhale. "I know, luv," he said. "It's just –"

"I know," Anna interrupted. "Don't. Let's not talk about it right now."

"Alright."

"Are you ok?"

A pause. "Yeah. I think I'm getting there."

"Good. The flowers are beautiful," she added, just to keep the conversation going, to feel his presence near her, that much longer. "You didn't have to do that."

"Well, while I'm gone I want you to see them and think about me, and how much I do love you."

For the first time in several days Anna could hear the passion, the intensity, back in his voice, and the sound of it made her as giddy as a schoolgirl with her first crush. She laughed a little shakily, as much at herself as at him. "As if I could do anything else."

"See you in the morning?" Another pause. "Breakfast, before I have to go?"

She could detect a note of hesitation in his tone, and a sudden wave of frustration swept away her momentary euphoria. The idea that he imaged for one instant that she might not want to see him in the morning…now…anytime at all – she hated that he was still doubting himself about her.

"Of course," she replied swiftly, to reassure him that she had no hesitation at all.

"Fine. Sweet dreams, luv."

Anna fingered the note, reading his words once more. "Sweet dreams."

* * *

Anna was just putting the finishing touches on the table the next morning when Robert appeared from the bedroom, fully dressed and carrying a packed overnight bag.

He stopped abruptly and stared at the scene in front of him. "What's this?"

"Breakfast," she said brightly, trying to ignore the sudden wariness that had appeared in his expression. "If you'll recall I accepted your invitation last night."

Robert studied the table, complete with place settings, coffee mugs and plates piled high with fruit and muffins. "I was thinking we'd go down to the restaurant."

Anna gave a studious shrug. "I thought it would be nicer here."

His eyes flicked to hers. "I thought Tom said we should keep our distance for a few days," he reminded her, his voice low and even.

"I'm not asking you to take me to bed, Robert. Just sit across the table and eat." Anna fought to keep the irritation out of her tone. Could he not see that she wasn't going to allow any more distance to come between them? That she refused to let them succumb to their fears? Especially not after last night, when he'd reassured her in the most beautiful way that he did love her, still and always.

As she loved him.

But god he could be such hard work sometimes.

Still, there was something she needed to tell him this morning. Something he needed to hear before he went. She just hoped that after yesterday's session with Tom Hardy he would finally be in a frame of mind to believe what she had to say.

She sat and poured herself a cup of coffee, then another for Robert.

After a moment he joined her and they spent the next twenty minutes sharing their usual breakfast fare. The meal passed mostly in silence, but in a silence that to Anna felt companionable and not forced. Robert seemed less tired and irritable than he had been for the past few days, and she herself had slept well in Robin's room despite last night's misgivings.

Robert was just finishing his last croissant when Anna decided the time was right. She set aside her napkin and leaned forward. "Robert. You remember that night you became a traditionalist? When we agreed not to be together before we got married?"

"What a mistake that was," he replied with a wry grimace, sounding so much like his old self that Anna inwardly rejoiced.

Smiling genuinely for the first time in what felt like weeks, she continued, "You said that other than when we were first married and now, you'd never been in love with me."

He nodded. "When we met again in 1985 I was with Holly, and after that…well, you were with Duke."

"I know." Anna nodded at the familiar words. This was what they always said when the subject came up. In truth, though, there was more to it than that, and Robert knew it as well as she did. Yet as always he was trying to spare her feelings. To spare her from the very worst of what she'd done.

Well, it was time they faced it. "It was more than that though, wasn't it," she continued slowly. "It was what I'd done to you. My betrayal, and most of all, the Swede."

"Anna –"

"No, it's true. When you told me what had happened to him, I knew it was over between us. How could you ever let yourself fall for me again when you had blood on your hands because of what I'd done."

Robert stirred. "I couldn't, I –"

Anna reached across the table and shushed him with a gentle finger over his lips. "I know." She shook her head. "After Holly died I would have gone back to you in a minute. In a minute. But I knew it wasn't possible. I always knew." Her eyes were sad and filled with regret and understanding.

"We had a bond, because of Robin," Robert hastened say, feeling the need to reassure her. "I always did love you because of that."

Anna nodded lightly, though her eyes were still shadowed with sadness. "But it wasn't the same."

He looked down for a moment, then admitted quietly, "No. It wasn't until Sean's confession, when we found out the Swede was alive, that I…began to wonder what might have been."

"But then you were with Kate."

His smile was rueful. "I guess the timing was never quite right."

"Until now."

"Yes."

Anna took a deep breath. It was time to say what she needed to tell him – the reason why she'd wanted to have breakfast here in private instead of going down to the restaurant – and just pray that he would trust she was being honest with him.

He waited, regarding her quietly.

"I've been in love with you, though, all this time," Anna admitted haltingly. "Pretty much from the first day we met." She nodded to herself in simple acknowledgment of the fact, one that she'd never before admitted aloud, except once to Sean, when he had seen the early signs that she and Robert were finding their way back to each other even before they'd been fully sure of it themselves. "Even when I was with Duke. I loved him, I really did. But all the time he was just the man I had because I couldn't have the one I really wanted."

"Look, I'd like to believe that –"

"Believe it, Robert," she cut in, insistent. She leaned forward, caressing his face with her eyes, willing him to hear the truth in what she was saying. Somehow he had to understand, had to believe, that every word came from her heart. "God, I've never stopped loving you and I never will. No one, least of all Faison, will ever get in the way of that."

Robert continued to gaze at her in silence. His blue eyes were intent on hers, but his face gave nothing away. Yet he seemed to be really, truly listening to her, which gave her the courage to carry on.

"I could never betray you again, Robert. I couldn't bear it. The last time we both paid with thirteen years of our lives." She shook her head, fighting back the tears that pricked the corners of her eyes at the thought. "I could never go through that again."

Robert sat back in his chair and exhaled a slow breath. "Understood."

"Do you really understand?" she pleaded, eyes locked on his.

"Yes." His voice was low and husky with sincerity, and Anna knew that he meant it. He hesitated. "Just – give me a little more time." He placed his napkin on the table and stood.

"I – I will." Anna stood as well and came around the table to join him, biting her lip, hoping for a conciliatory hug or even just a clasp of the hands, or better still a quick kiss like yesterday evening when they'd returned to the suite after dinner. She had always been addicted to his touch – the feel of his strength beneath her hands, the taste of his mouth against hers – and being without it even for this short period of time was beginning to drive her mad.

Instead he cleared his throat uncomfortably. "I should get going."

Swallowing down her disappointment, Anna forced herself to take a step back. Giving him space. Doing what Tom suggested, as difficult as that was.

Robert rounded the table and picked up his travel bag. With an uncharacteristically shy glance in her direction he hoisted the bag and went to the door. Already missing him acutely, Anna watched in strained silence as he stopped with his hand on the doorknob and looked back at her over his shoulder. "See you in three days."

Anna nodded. This was going to be the longest three days of her life. "Just remember what I said. Please."

Robert gave her a crooked smile. "I will." He paused, his eyes on hers, and then tipped his head towards the vase of roses still sitting on the table in the center of the room. "Remember what I said, too," he murmured.

Anna's heart lifted and a glorious smile blossomed across her face. "I will."

He nodded and sketched her a two-fingered salute, and in the next instant he was gone.

Anna let out a low sigh. Slowly she made her way across the room to the vase of red roses that sat on the table. She leaned in and breathed in their sweet, heady scent, then pressed her fingers to her lips. "I love you too, Robert," she whispered. "Always."

FIN


End file.
